The other day i was outside having a cigarette, when some guys came up and grabbed my coat. Remembering Jesus' healing of the bleeding woman, i turned to them and said, "Who the fuck touched my garments?"
The miracle was a failure, however, for instead of being healed of their afflictions, they took stones from the ground and pounded the unholy crap out of me instead.
Bible Worker, i know that the Messiah preached about the brotherhood of man, and i have tried to 'turn the other cheek.' But i fear that my patience has run out. If they are my brothers, why can't i beat them?
Love in Christ,